Resolutions

The New year is almost upon us. This is always the time for resolutions changes and the birth of hopes and dreams. As with any resolution, habits cannot happen overnight. Each step taken even the smallest ones need to be taken to achieve your goals,afterall one would not expect a person who never played a note on a piano to wake up the next day a concert virtuoso. Even the most talented artists become so with elbow grease and lots of dedication.
Then why is it that our society expects perfection overnight? In our modern north American society of instant gratification is the norm. We want everything now. Get skinny fast- read quickly, multitask and instantly learn a new skill- no effort involved!

Anyway, the plan this year it to take things step by step, slow and steady wins the race! i hope! hahaha. I will keep you posted on how my step by step process of learning stuff will develop.
I need to reach those goals

Fatigued - why am I doing this again?

Its been a while since I posted anything. I ended up taking some freelance work and as usual the work is proving to be taking over my personal life, meaning I end up having no personal life and thus no blog posts. No drawing at home, or even a doodle. My creative outlet is temporarily closed down.

However in these types of situations it always seems "temporary"- until its 2-3 years later and I am still grinding away and 30 pounds overweight.
I am starting to wonder if in this industry I can possibly find a balance between career happiness and personal happiness. In the last couple of years I have worked at various companies. If I end up at a large company I find myself a cog in the machine, one of many easily replaced in this age of digital education and cheap computer hardware. Anyone can learn to do what I do, but that's a point for another blog post. If i go to a small company they work you to the bone, mainly because what I am seeing in this economy is that no one has any money. They will pay you a decent salary for 1 person, but you will end up doing the job of 2 people.
And this is not a big complaint on my part- I can understand the situations companies are in nowadays, but my main issue is how to fulfill my personal and creative goals and still find peace and happiness at work.

This unbalance in work, and home life leads me to question my choice in career. In the past have been I have been angry when i fall into this type of situation , angry with myself and  with managers who imply the overtime, and the fear and guilt that comes along with the option of saying "no" to the implied overtime. But now I am thinking this is all within my control. Its making me questions why I feel guilt and fear, when I am the one who is letting this happen to me. What will happen if i say no? Probably nothing. Will the heaven's open up and strike me down with lightning? Most likely not.  The worst that may happen would be I wont get hired back for more work.  Either way at this point in my life I am not further ahead of the game. I don't own a house, I don't have roots anywhere because I move so much. I have no kids because work is all I do.And in the same breath, maybe because I have no house, no spouse, no kids, no debt, this is the perfect time to say no. I am not being held hostage by my mortgage, or financing my child's education. If i don't have a job tomorrow its ok, because I don't have a bank coming after me for money. I won't be able to go out, and my budget will be very limited, however since I got laid off from bedlam I am already in that situation. And I am finding it extremely difficult to procure myself a permanent job in Toronto. Maybe this is a sign.

A sign to pursue what my heart is telling me to do. A sign to take it slower, smell the roses, look at the sun or feel the rain on my face when I walk outside. A sign to put down the cell phone, email, android/iphone, and take in what is going on around me, take in life and live.

When I am old and I want look back on this point of my life and see myself as someone who accomplished what they wanted to do, not someone who is angry, disappointing and bitter. Not someone over stressed, fatigued and unhappy. I just need help finding the right balance, and if that includes adding the word No to my vocabulary then that might be what I need to do. After-all,  you only live once.

Forest Whitaker painting caricature

My drawing of Forest whitaker. I always seem to personalize my drawing/painting time. as if i am having a nice cup of tea with them. Learning about their lives as I look at their faces. First I do my sketch, now i'm doing the painting part, which is going to take me a lot of time. I will post updates later tonight or tomorrow depending how late i work on this

Monster Painting

Initial sketch on painting

First layer of painting going in

I am currently working on a series of paintings. This is the first one, its entitled Fall. Its a little girl with a monster , walking hand in hand in the park. the monster might change a bit more, but he is a bird monster. Maybe she is showing him the way to fly south for the winter, or maybe they are on their way to the nearest shop for a cup of warm coco!
Work is done in Acrylic on a 12X16 Canvas.

Lupe

Lupe and I had a wonderful Saturday Evening. He didnt buy me dinner. He didnt take me to a movie. Nope but we connected. My wacom tablet with his beautiful face. Actually this is for an assignment, but I got to say this dude has lips! big juicy ones that were so fun to draw.
My hands hurt now, so i'm going to go and dance.

Ciao

The Four Agreements

This is a book i have come back to over the last couple of years. I would say that it has some of the best guidance for everyone. A toltec wisdom book. I seriously did not know anything about toltec until i picked up this book a few years back.
Its really something people should pick up. It seems as I mature and grow I seem to find new and different wisdom from this book depending on what is going on in my life.
First agreement Be Impeccable with your Word. I think that speaks for itself. Essentially its honour your word. Its so simple but its something most people do not keep. 
Second Agreement - Don't take anything personally.

Third Agreement- Don't Make Assumptions
I have done this before. I assume something is happening because of something that is not in my control. Either because someone did not like what i did or said, but in the end, because I know I am very professional when i work, i know that its just my mind making assumptions. People will always have other motives for doing things that in most cases have nothing to do with me. In the end I have learnt to have confidence in myself and not take these things seriously. Thus going back to the second agreement. not to take it personally.


Fourth Agreement - Always do your best
This one is very important. Not less important than the others but just to remember to always try your best. yes somethings might not work out but if you tried, and put 100 percent of yourself into whatever you are doing, then you will never regret your actions. Do your best -No more no less, if you overdo it, then this is a waste of energy. At the moment I truly feel a period of transformation and i am going with it!

Take the time -read the book, its so little, it takes no time, either on your  commute, or a plane ride or waiting for friend, then you can pass it to them afterwards eh!  Ok upward and onward.

Below is the work i am doing tonight for a caricature for the course I am taking. I can never stay still, so I am learning to paint in photoshop. ANd hopefully I can do freelance illustrations soon and work independently.

Happy Weekend Everyone

Sea Horse Wip

I have been watching a lot of Life from BBC. And I saw these amazing Weedy Dragons. Since I am still drawing dragons I wanted to get into the anatomy of sea creatures.

I will be starting to post more of my sketchbooks soon as well. Here is a Wip. I will be doing more updates over the next few days

Eagle Study Wip

Job Satisfaction - Bob Bates - GDC 2010 Conference

I was sent this inspiring link this week about job satisfaction. After my time in Oregon I totally see this as being true. Enjoy and happy friday!

http://www.gdcvault.com/play/1012343/The-Belly-of-the-Whale

Conan

I have been trying to do Caricatures of regular people and I have to say its pretty hard stuff. So sometimes I keep switching between regular folks and celebrities. Somehow some of these stars have the funniest faces. Yesterday i saw this cool blog Elaine Bogan. And she created a Zombie Conan. Since i am trying to do caricatures I figured i would try to do something with him.
Again its all practice practice practice.

haha

David Bowie Study

Since I am currently studying Caricature, I was decided to try a quick study of David Bowie. its really not easy. First of all his pupils are not the same size.
Also as I started to write this blog post, I went to the gym, so I had some time to distance myself from the image and can see how it does and how it does not look like Mr. Bowie.
I will have to try again tomorrow!

Creepy Villain

Martin

 

I am not sure how this director find these actors, but their faces really are amazing especially for caricature. Actually the more i worked on it , the more it was freaking me out. His intent- his gaze is just so intense and so morbid

I'm not going to mention what movie it is, because i really don't want to have the search bots picking this up right now, but if you watch a lot of films and you watched the first one and saw the trailer for this new torture p**rn flick then you will know where this photo comes from.
Cheers.

Kirby...poo

i have been struggling with creature design, trying to understand the animal anatomy these past couple of weeks. Since I am currently unemployed, as the "temp layoff" if no longer temp, I have time to work on my skills.

My model today is my dog Kirby.

Animated Gif Love.

I love animated pixel art. I love game boy games and old school art.... just have to learn to make some good ones. here is my first attempt- based off of a tutorial on gamasutra

Now that I no longer work for Bedlam , I am no longer under their contractual clauses- therefore all the things I create at home on my own time are mine! Including games. I am really a fan of Crittercrunch its a game made by Toronto based Gaming company http://www.capybaragames.com/  

Update: i just made this little doggy dude up here tonight. took me about 1 hour- since i was just going with the flow. I am going to look into what game engines I could use. Maybe GameMaker -or Unity.

Steve Jobs- RIP

I figured i would try my hand at doing caricatures and while Iwas practicing in Photoshop this evening I saw a news feed saying Steve Jobs had passed away. I am not really good at caricature yet but practice makes perfect so here is a little doodle of  Mr. Jobs, because i thought it was fitting and he was an amazing man

Thank you Steve showing the world that you can follow your dreams. 

Snooki Fan Art

Final Snooki Fan Art

Yesterday i thought it was Thursday. I don't know why. Maybe i was missing me some Jersey Shore. I don't have MTV so I usually end up watching it on mtv.ca.  I never watched the show up until I moved back to Toronto. Then it seemed that Hell's Kitchen was done and I needed something else to play in the background while I was working on my computer in the late evenings. Something mind numbing, something hilarious. That something was Jersey Shore. And what would that show be without Snooki. Probably less meatball-like and less fun.
For all those who hate the show, that's cool, but for a time to do a portrait or caricature nothing can be better than an over tanned jersey girl. Such a character. Really in the long run Characters are what make stories interesting. These are the types of elements that i always want to be aware of. This sketch took about 45 mins. I would consider that fast because I don't draw celebrities or anyone who must have a resemblance. Also i am staying in black and white for now so i can concentrate on my values, however i can add tones to this anytime.

Work In Progress- Reference Image and my photoshop image side by side for reference. I do not trace- i am looking for shapes and elements that are her face and trying to bring them out

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Camelot Eva Green Fan Art

Eva Green FanArt

I have been rewatching Camelot here in Canada. I actually have seen the entire first season while I was visiting LA. All the good stuff is showing in the USA but sadly it takes a while for it to arrive to Canada.
Either way I was enjoying Eva Green's performance. I told myself the first time that I would sketch her while I watched but that did not happen. Nevertheless I sat myself down this time around and started my first attempt at making someone really look like their character. Its tough, but lots of fun. I was just trying to capture the essence and for me its truely in her eyes. They are so intense.
I am sad that they may have cancelled the show, because it ended in such a great place. More drawings of her to come!

Lil Digi Dragons

My hands hurt. Cramping up really, but only my right hand from holding my wacom tablet too long. I delving in digital painting, deeper than i have gone in the past.

This week as been a lot about painting dragons and other animals. I realize i have to do a lot more anatomical studying because i really dont know as much as I should. Nevertheless I managed to pump out this little dragon buddy today in about 1 hour which is impressive enough for me because i go super slow on my tablet.
I figure though if i take a small step everyday i can manage to get to where i need to go.
Its tough because when one is unemployed most people think they are being lazy or doing nothing, but i'm actually working pretty hard at learning new parts of the digital world. Thankfully no one has given me any flack, instead people have been pretty supportive.

I will continue on with the Anatomy and then also learn to model a character i been dying to do in maya. Stay tuned.

Ollie the Otter and the Halibut

Back at the end of 2008 my friend Charles Wardlaw recommended me for a small project at Red Rover,called Ollie the Otter and the baked Halibut. Its owned by CritterPix and they are now making a full feature film. http://www.critterpix.com/ollie.html

Sadly they spelled my name incorrectly, however I am still proud to have worked on a little short like this with some really talented people.

Book of the Week: #2 Stranger in a Strange Land

My commute to work is 1 hour each way. That leaves me with a fair amount of time to actually read books i have been wanting to read but never found the time to.
So for this week, week 2 i have chosen Stranger in a Strange land by Robert A. Heinlein.

Where is week 1? That was last week but i did not post anything for it, because i did not know i would still be able to read a book within a week. Last week's book was Miss Charlaine Harris' Dead to the World. I have been trying to read them because i love True Blood so much. I want to see how the two diverge from one another or not.
The book was fairly interesting and I would hope that somehow they would do that for Season 3 of True Blood.

Going back to Stranger in a Strange land , I am really enjoying it so far. Its pacing is good and the type of dialogue is reminiscent of 1950s but set far in the future when human beings are able to actually visit the planet mars.

I will post an update later this week on the rest of the book and how its been

back in Toronto

I arrived back in Toronto this weekend. I am tired. Pretty tired. I slept on a few floors before and after getting here. My furniture is in transit. New job starts tomorrow. I am excited about putting my drawing table back together, which is currently sitting in my basement storage room.
Also they opened a Michael's store 5 mins away driving from my house. SO i can get more super sculpey and start playing with it again.

Animation 2d

I was looking at an old hard drive I left behind here in Toronto and found this animation i did in 2009 in Flipbook
Its a cool software and I need to play with it some more for sure.
For now i will post this up.
Happy New Year